So I got on the scale at the gym today and it read 290.1. I couldn't believe it. I got on 3 more times and moved the scale around, and made sure my feet were all the way on it, moved my feet around... and the scale waivered 0.2 lbs. There was no excitement, or joy, or anything... I just stared at it in disbelief. I don't feel my waist is getting any smaller. My clothes fit better, but when I measure, there doesn't seem to be much difference. So I'm thinking that I'm beginning to loose it all over, people at work say it seems that I'm melting away. My friend told me today that everytime she see's me I get smaller and smaller. Where has my excitement gone?! I've been busting my ass at that gym 5-6 days a week, yet I look at the scale as if it couldn't be right! I belive real strongly in the power of our minds, and how thoughts manifest our lives around us, so me feeling that this can't be true brings fear that I may slow my weight loss. I'm just going to have to keep praying that God remove the fear and allow me to feel joy and gratitude with my weight loss. I'm almost 30 lbs less than what I was in June, and I look at the mirror and feel huge. I don't get it! LOL I'm just like, WTF is wrong with me!? Be proud! Be happy! Be SOMETHING other than skeptical! I'm wearing scrubs and clothes I've not been able to wear in almost a year. My body is literally morphing in front of my eyes, and yet I'm skeptical? Maybe it's because about 2 weeks ago I seen the Acai berry at Wallgreens on 2 for 10 bucks and I feel somewhat hypocrytical. I was going to do this all with hardwork and watching what I eat. But I thought as long as I keep doing what I'm doing, what can it hurt? It's loaded with antioxidants, which are GREAT for the body, and it's not a pill, it's all natural (being so passionate about holistic mediciene, I try herbs, Reiki, diet/excersise, etc before any pill) ... so maybe that's where it's coming from. I'm not sure, I know I feel better writing this out, so I'm about to go to bed and pray for joy and gratitude, and ask God to continue helping me become a healthier me. Goodnight all, and God bless you on your journey to being a healthier you ;)...
Love & LIght
Dottie
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